It's Not What It Looks Like ... Is It?

So I've been seeing this patient of mine for like five years now. He came to me when he was dealing with some major health issues, and we built a really good relationship over time. Nothing weird ever happened between us, mind you, it's just that sometimes, as doctors go, you get a bit closer than the average professional to your patients because of all the emotional stuff that goes on during treatments and whatnot. Anyway, I don't know if it was the late hours or the way his eyes looked at me during our sessions but one night, when he walked in for a routine check-up and I was alone in the office (and yes, no nurses around), something just clicked. Maybe it was my imagination running wild because of how stressed I had been with my personal life, or maybe... maybe there's something more. It got to this point where I found myself fantasizing about him in ways that made me feel ashamed but also strangely relieved when I acted on those feelings, sorta like letting the steam out of a pressure cooker. We started exchanging notes and emails that were, let's just say, far from what you'd expect between doctor and patient. One night we ended up staying late at the office after hours talking about... other things. I didn't mean for it to happen but somehow the conversation led to touching hands, then a hug turned into more. The next day was awkward as hell of course, but also oddly refreshing in a way. He was older than me actually, which added another layer of complexity and thrill. Would I do it again? Probably. But hey, what would people say if they knew we were pushing the limits of patient-doctor relations just for the heck of it? It's not illegal or anything serious going on, but yeah... sometimes you gotta wonder if there's more to the rules than meets the eye.