my new freedom sucks

so yeah i just got divorced and my ex ain't into anything kinky or taboo. but i have this real craving for some good old fashioned dominant/submissive roleplay, you know? like that scene in 50 shades where christian does all those things to ana but way more realistic. i mean, she's not really a virgin anymore and he’s got more experience too. i've been watching these videos on my phone of men giving orders and women obeying them, with leather and chains and stuff. today i walked into this kink club downtown kinda hoping someone would notice me as the subbie type but nobody did, which was disappointing 'cos i really wanted to be picked up for some serious bdsm action tonight. so now i’m stuck in my apartment thinking about it all night instead.