My Secret Kink and Its Impact on My Relationship

I've been in a committed relationship with my partner, Alex, for about six months now. We both agree that our relationship is solid and healthy, but there's this one thing I keep hiding from him: a secret kink of mine. It started when I was exploring online forums and stumbled upon discussions about dominance and submission dynamics. As someone who usually takes charge in most areas of my life, the idea of surrendering control in intimate settings intrigued me deeply. Over time, this curiosity evolved into a specific fantasy involving roleplay scenarios where I am completely submissive to someone else. The more I thought about it, the clearer it became that I wanted to try this with Alex. However, the fear of rejection and how he would perceive my interest in such an unconventional kink made me hesitant to bring it up. We have discussed other types of intimacy openly, but this feels different, more personal. One night, we were watching a movie about BDSM when I felt compelled to mention it casually, hoping for some kind of opening to discuss the topic further. But Alex didn't seem interested or receptive to the conversation at all. Instead, he quickly changed the subject and suggested going out somewhere else. Since then, I've been conflicted. Part of me wants to share this side of myself with Alex because it feels like a significant part of my sexuality that deserves exploration. Yet another part worries about jeopardizing what we have by revealing something so intense and potentially threatening to the balance of our relationship. So far, I haven't brought up the subject again but can feel the growing tension within me every time we engage in intimate activities. There are moments when I want to beg Alex to try it with me just because I know how much it would mean for my own fulfillment and understanding of myself. Yet the fear keeps holding me back. It's a dilemma that consumes a lot of energy; trying not to let it affect other aspects of our relationship while also wondering whether I should risk losing everything by bringing this up.