my biggest secret

i met this guy at a friends party, hes older and we hit it off real quick. hes in his late 40s but has always been into the idea of younger women which i loved. so me being trans and not even fully transitioning at that point made him extra excited about my youthful appearance despite my adult life choices. we started dating, he was super into my body and stuff even before knowing all the details. one night we were at his place and it got real steamy real fast. hes so experienced compared to me im still figuring shit out but hes been helping me explore myself in ways i never thought possible. one day after a few months of dating, he suggested something really taboo for us. he wanted to pretend i wasnt trans anymore and just do everything as if we werent crossing any lines, just treating it like our regular stuff. at first im scared but the attraction is so intense with him that i agree. so this guy who knows all about me being trans and my journey decides hes going to fuck me in a way that completely erases any of that for himself. we do it in this really dark room where nothing reflects the reality of who we are. its like playing pretend but more intense, the sex is raw and unapologetic as he goes hard into me. afterward i feel so mixed up about what just happened. hes been supportive otherwise but that moment felt like erasing an important part of my identity to suit his desires. im confused if this makes us unhealthy or just kink compatible in some weird way. im asking you guys, does something like this make me the asshole for agreeing? is it okay for trans people to be sexual objects where we get erased to fit cisnormative fantasies? how do i move forward here with a guy i still care about but feel so unsure about what just happened.