Caught Myself Desiring Him in Unexpected Ways

I never thought I’d be the kind of person who’s attracted to her this way. She's my partner of three years, but lately something feels different. Last night was the breaking point, while we were making love, a part of me wondered what it would feel like if someone else took over, hands that weren't hers guiding and controlling. It felt wrong and right at the same time, an illicit thrill mixed with a deep longing I’ve never acknowledged before. Our bodies moved as one, but my mind was elsewhere, picturing another man’s touch in moments where she's usually dominant. The sensations were overwhelming, her hands, strong and sure, contrasted sharply with images of someone else’s fingers gripping me roughly. It left me trembling afterwards, a mix of arousal and guilt coursing through me as I held her close, both craving the stability we share and yearning for something more forbidden. Our relationship is good, but this new desire feels like it could unravel everything if I let it take root.