The Patient's Secret Pleasure

I met him about six months ago, my first day at the new clinic. Dr. James was one of the senior doctors there, and I felt a strange pull towards him from the moment we shook hands. It wasn't just professional respect; it was something else, deeper and more... intimate. As weeks turned into months, our interactions became less about medical matters and more about personal chats. He seemed interested too, often leaving messages or sending emails with casual inquiries. But there was always a line we didn't cross, both of us aware of the professional boundary that existed between doctor and nurse. That line started to blur when I received an email from him one evening, asking if I could come to his office for a late-night consultation regarding patient records. I agreed, thinking nothing more of it than providing help where needed. Little did I know, our meeting would turn into something far beyond paperwork and notes. As soon as I entered his office, the atmosphere felt different. The air was charged with an electricity that couldn't be ignored. Dr. James looked nervous yet determined, his eyes locking onto mine before he spoke in a low voice about the possibility of his career moving elsewhere. It seemed like an innocent conversation until he mentioned needing someone to take over some of his responsibilities temporarily, and then the invitation for dinner was made. Dinner led to drinks, and drinks turned into an admission of mutual attraction we had been too cautious to act on earlier. Before I knew it, our kisses became more heated, hands exploring where they shouldn't in a public setting. By midnight, we found ourselves back at his apartment, both desperate for physical connection that seemed so taboo. That night was raw and intense, every touch igniting desires long repressed under the guise of professional decorum. He took me roughly on the kitchen counter first, then moved us to the bedroom where our lovemaking continued with a fierce passion I had never experienced before. The way he held me down, dominating yet tender in equal measure, left no doubt about his authority and my willingness to submit. Since that night, we've seen each other only when absolutely necessary at work but have maintained an intense relationship on the side, full of secret meetings and whispered promises under the cover of darkness. I'm torn between guilt over breaking professional ethics and exhilaration from our illicit passion. So here's my question: Am I being unreasonable to feel this way? Or is it just part of human nature to push boundaries when they seem too rigid? Please, tell me what you think.