My Art Can't Capture This Void

I've been painting for years, but lately my brushes feel like they're just tracing the same old lines. My latest piece is supposed to capture a sense of longing and desire, but every time I look at it, all I see is a void, not in the canvas, but within myself. Lately, this feeling has become a physical ache that comes alive only when my partner is close enough for me to feel their breath on my neck. But the moment we're apart again, the emptiness returns, more profound than ever before. It's like I'm constantly chasing after something just out of reach, an image or sensation that my art and even our intimacy can't quite bring to life. In bed with him, I've tried to lose myself in pleasure, hoping it would fill this dark space inside me. But no matter how close we get physically, there's always this chasm between us, a part of me that remains untouched by his touch or mine. Maybe my work will find its way eventually, but for now, the only solace I can find is in knowing I'm not alone with these feelings, even if I am entirely on my own.