i might be the asshole here

so my thing has always been bondage and stuff like that. i know it’s not everyone’s cup of tea but i love feeling completely at his mercy, you know? i’ve kept most of this pretty much to myself because he doesn’t really share this interest or anything similar. we have a good sex life, don’t get me wrong, just not something i can indulge in too often. the other night though… i had been thinking about it for ages and couldn’t take it anymore. so i told him i wanted to try some stuff out but he was hesitant at first. eventually agreed under one condition - that we’d both wear blindfolds and there would be no talking, only noises. i understood his rules and said ok. the night came and we did it. everything went as planned, the feel of the ropes on my wrists and ankles, his hands running all over me… everything was so intense but also kind of scary being unable to see or talk. i wanted more and he was pushing back a bit but still doing what we agreed. it got physical at one point when i started feeling out of control. before i knew it, my hips were grinding against his hand faster than ever, moans escaping my lips without me thinking. there was no stopping once it began - everything felt too good to stop. now here i am the next day and i’m worried. he seemed fine but we didn’t really talk about what happened or how he’s feeling now. am i being selfish for wanting this? is this something wrong that we should have a serious conversation about? i love him and want us to be happy, not cause problems.