After The Shift

i just got off work at the coffee shop and had to drive home alone tonight. been feeling really lost since things ended with my ex but i met someone randomly online and we hooked up. it was more than i bargained for emotionally. he was rough, and i loved every second of it. it’s not like me to seek out this kind of thing so im left wondering if its a phase or something deeper. dont really know what to do with these feelings