The Patient's Touch Crossed a Line

I’ve been practicing medicine for five years now, but it’s only recently that I’ve had to deal with an ethical dilemma I never expected. It started when Dr. Patel left the clinic where I work. He was a good friend and mentor who always looked out for his patients' comfort and health. In his absence, patient care has felt more impersonal somehow. My colleagues are competent but they haven’t quite taken to heart the human touch that Dr. Patel prioritized. One of my regulars is Sarah. She’s in her late twenties and has been dealing with anxiety and panic attacks for years. I’ve always tried to give extra attention to my patients with mental health issues, like a nod to Dr. Patel's teachings. Recently, as part of our standard procedure, we began using physical exams to assess the effectiveness of prescribed medications on conditions like hers. During one such exam, I found myself hesitating when Sarah asked me if I could check her heart rate through palpation. It’s a routine test that requires no more than light contact and brief exposure of skin. But something about her demeanor made my palms sweat. As she undressed to the point where only her bra and panties remained, an unexpected feeling crept over me, desire. I tried to focus on my job but when I touched her chest area, through thin fabric and with my gloved hands, my heart raced. Despite being a professional, I couldn’t ignore how my body responded. The heat between us was palpable, and it wasn't just the room temperature causing it. The examination concluded, I asked Sarah if she felt any better after the medication adjustments. Her response caught me off guard, 'You know, Doctor, when you touched me like that... It made me feel something else entirely.' She blushed deeply as we both understood exactly what she was referring to. My head was spinning; my ethics versus my desires. Since then, I’ve been struggling with this internal conflict every time Sarah visits. Should the patient come first or should I follow my heart? This isn't just about physical attraction anymore but an ethical boundary that’s become increasingly blurry. Is it wrong to feel drawn to someone you’re treating? Am I overthinking things? Or is there a way to navigate through this without compromising professional integrity? I need your advice: am I the asshole here, or is there something more I should be considering in terms of my career and personal ethics?