guilty secret

just broke up with my gf a month ago and i couldn't stop thinking about the night before we split. we were both drunk and i convinced her to do things we never tried before, stuff that was kinda taboo for us. she said yes but seemed unsure. when it happened, she froze and asked if i really wanted this, if i could wait until she felt ready. i got so embarrassed and frustrated with myself for pushing her like that. didn't mean to hurt her or rush things.