A Small Lie

I've been dating Alex for over two years, we have similar tastes in just about everything except one particular kink: bondage play. Last week, during our usual Saturday night movie date, we decided to watch something a bit more adventurous... Instead of telling him my true feelings about the film's scene involving rope work (which I actually find quite arousing), I told Alex I didn't enjoy it much and was thinking about ending things soon if this kind of stuff kept coming up. Afterward, he seemed relieved that we might be on a better path moving forward, or so I thought. This lie has been weighing heavily on me lately; the guilt of not being truthful to someone who deserves honesty in return feels far worse than any physical act ever could. Plus, it's making me question whether our relationship can survive without openness about every aspect, even those that might make either of us uncomfortable. A small white lie, and yet here I am second-guessing everything.