just thinking too much i guess

so like i just got out of this long relationship and it ended really badly. we did a lot of stuff together and sometimes it was kinda dark, yknow? like there were these times when one of us would be in control and the other had to follow orders. it wasn't real nonconsent or anything, but it felt intense. i've been wondering if that's why things fell apart, cause we both really enjoyed being in charge sometimes and it made everything feel so much more serious than usual. am i just overthinking this? is there something wrong with liking roles like that even though everything was consensual?