My Secret Fantasy

I feel so ashamed admitting this, but it’s been eating at me for weeks. My girlfriend and I are happy together, really we are, but sometimes… there’s a part of me that just wants something different, something wilder. We had this one night where she wanted to role-play a CNC scenario, but with safety words of course. She was the boss, telling me what to do, how to act. It started out tame enough, just some dirty talk and spanking, you know, stuff we’d normally do in bed. But then it got… darker. I mean, she wasn’t actually pushing my limits or making me feel uncomfortable, but there were these moments where the role-play crossed into something more intense. She said things that made me squirm, like telling me to ‘be a good boy’ and obey her every command. And you know what? I liked it. It was thrilling in a way that nothing else has been. But afterwards, I felt dirty, like I’d betrayed our relationship somehow. Part of me wants to do more, but another part is terrified of where this could go. What’s wrong with me?